JAMES IHEAKANWA
Limbo
(noun).
An intermediate, transitional, or midway state or place.
Limbo
(noun).
An intermediate, transitional, or midway state or place.
Our location is inside a dimly lit, shared music recording studio situated in between the suburb of Mascot and Alexandria. As he sits in a generic office chair waiting to be interviewed, James fidgets and scratches and taps, undeniably anxious to get back to editing his music, yet to be released. His stage name B Wise, though, he enjoys calling himself the Benchman.
N: Why is that?
J: Well, I’ve always felt like I had something to prove, and have always had to stand on the sideline to wait for my chance to shine or excel. I really felt that I had somewhat made an imprint in my life and career but I hadn’t just made it there yet. I had made it on the team but I still haven’t had the right opportunity to speak up for who I really am. At the time, I thought it’s how I would be feeling long-term so it kinda just… stuck. That’s why I could originally identify with the concept of being a benchman.
N: I assumed that by giving yourself an alias like the benchman that you are pretty self-aware with your identity and overall where you are in life and your career. Wouldn't you say that’s true?
J: Not necessarily. Being the benchman comes with some shade of grey area. You haven’t reached your full potential, and no one knows what you're fully capable of just yet. Only you know what you want to and can become.
N: How do you feel currently being a mixed-race male living in Australia? Do you think those feelings any different to when you were a 15-year-old going through high school in the suburbs of Liverpool?
J: I feel fine with it now as a 28-year-old male adult. I can’t say I was always fine with it though. It took me years to be comfortable in my own skin and be confident in myself as a person and not feel I had to fit in with either race to be accepted.
N: What are the 3 main things that shaped your identity today?
J: Uhh 3 main shapers of my identity would have to be travelling the world, and the country, music, and certain reading materials growing up (e.g. Malcolm X autobiography). Also if I can add a fourth, it would be being isolated as a man with no financial support or older male influences for a certain period of time.
N: Do you think that spending most of your formative years in Liverpool (a distinctly multicultural suburb of NSW) had a major effect on where you are today as a person?
J: Most definitely. I think it made me a person who’s resilient and not afraid of new territory. It made me knowledgeable about other cultures and religions and also to have tougher skin.
"Being the benchman comes with some shade of grey area. You haven’t reached your full potential, and no one knows what your fully capable of just yet."
N: Have you ever experienced racism and do you still now?
J: Yes, unfortunately, I have experienced racism. One instance that was really forged into my memory was from kids during most of my primary school years when we lived in rural New South Wales. They would always get in my grill and pull my hair because it was 'nappy' and “like carpet.”
N: Do you think you could have been a better person or in a better position than you are now if you had gone through life without the challenges of racism?
J: No. I don’t regret my experiences, as it made me who I am today. I feel I’m more aware and better for it. I'm not saying I enjoyed it, but it made me tougher and able to cope with a lot more and be more aware of whether I'm inflicting the same on others.
N: Do you identify more as a Nigerian or an Australian?
J: More as a Nigerian, because Nigerians would always say you are a Nigerian, and this is your home. I was born in Australia and no one other than my mum has told me I’m an Australian.
N: Doesn't your Australian birth certificate mean anything then?
J: A document like that doesn't hold that much significance for me. I don't think it does for a lot of other individuals who are a part of a minority culture group either. It's more about the personal experiences and connections that really make you feel like you belong.
N: How has that way of thinking affected your friendship groups?
J: My friend groups are fairly mixed, but a majority would be West African, where a minority are Anglo-Australian. Even though I was surrounded by other cultures during school and work, predominately those who were white, I managed to weed out those who mirrored me haha!
N: Do you find yourself constantly tip-toeing between both worlds – to put it bluntly – black and white?
J: Yes, always tiptoeing just to assimilate.